Hello.

Hey. Just updates.

1. I feel miserable. Cause Bunny, has already passed on. It was on Monday morning when I was about to go school. Like I said he has a tumour around his stomach area. And for the past few weeks he wasn't able to sit/stand/eat/drink. So mom and I take turns to feed him and clean him everyday. But everysince that Sunday, it stopped eating. And when I give water, the water comes back out. So we already knew that the time would come soon. So that Monday morning when I was tying my hair, mom came into my room and told me to feed him as soon as I'm done. So when I was done, I went to him and put him into my arms. Tried giving him water but he didn't swallow. So I just wiped his mouth and held him still for a few seconds. Then at one point, he opened his mouth and breathed heavily. I just stared at him while my heart kept pumping like mad. After about 8 heavy breaths, he took one last breath, and breathed out. And then he stood still. So still that my heart stopped.

I was speechless. He was there, in my hands, took his last breath and went. All I could say was, "Bunny?" I shook him gently. When there was still no response and it was confirmed, tears started falling from my eyes as I hugged him close and whispered "I love you, Bunny." My heart sank. My mind blanked. I slowly stood up, held him in my arms, and went to mom's room to tell her the news. I had tears on my face so my parents were like, "Huh?!" Then they took a look and then made all the arrangements for Bunny and all. In the car I just sobbed and sobbed. So Nat, that day in the canteen, I cried because of that.

Bunny was a wonderful creature. I got him when I was in March during my 2nd year of Kindergarten. Which was 6 years old. Throughout these almost 10 years, Bunny's seen and heard everything. So losing Bunny is like a slap in the face to me because, when cats came into my life, I admit, I neglected him. I didn't take care of him as much as before. Because the cats were so interesting to me. Only last year, I started realising I'm selfish and unfair. Because he grew skinny, and unhealthy, in terms of hygiene and weight. So I tried my best to balance between him and my 5 other cats. When I found out he got tumour, I thought I was prepared to let him go. But judging from how I reacted in school, I guess I wasn't. I mean, he was my first rabbit, my first pet, damn. My first love. So thats why I couldn't let go so easily until we buried him on Tuesday night. I felt that at least he can't feel anymore pain. So I told myself, don't be selfish, don't hold him back, he'll be suffering from the pain if he continues to live. So I let him go and every night I tell him, before you go, let me be there during your last breaths. I want to be there with you. So I'm glad he waited for me. Sighs.

Bunny, wherever you are, I just wanna say, I miss you very much. And I still can't help but feel guilty for neglecting you before. Please forgive me. I love you very much and you'll always and forever stay in my heart.

2. Just other updates. I'm having baaad sore throat. I can't even talk properly just now on the phone with hmm hmm. Had to repeat almost every sentence. Hahah. Other than that, I've decided, I don't want to care about you anymore. Full stop.
So anything else I missed? Oh2! Dzul told me many people thought we were together. Hahah. Friends lah people.